wooho!

My weekend was pretty boring. I went to BINGO, thats right BINGO with my mom Friday night .. For those who dont know, I tend to go to bingo with my rents' for "Quality Time"..
I then stayed up all night talkin to Dan..
Saterday was even more interesting.. I went into town around 4pm and 'window shopped' till i ran into megan, who just so happened to be performing at the confed center and made plans for me to watch it with an old friend of mine Cory.. I havent seen or spoken to cory since grade 10. Megs dropped me off at his place, and we caught up..
We then went an looke at a apartmetn downtown together.. and just wholy crap! I never knew ch'town had such amazing apartments!
It was so huge and nice :)
I should move in there lol

We then headed over to see the show.. which was good
I am really glad that i decided to go in the end. :)
An now i am just about to drive into town to pick up my bro and his friend..
I still need a job.. :S
I am stressing even more about it..I am offically broke... Last 5 dollars was spent today
...

BORED!

I am bored, and annoyed..Cannot find anything productive to do so I am posting about it. I wanna go swimming..That would be really friggen fun! I should go to the university pool or something.
The hardest part of being stuck in the country..Is being stuck! i forgot how annoying it is to not have a vehicle, and how clasterphobic I get when I feel stuck. i wonder what everyone is up to this weekend,.
I am going to this play thing on Saterday.. So that should put some time in..Just not quite enough for satisfaction...Looks like I will have to look into that! haha.
Maybe I should get into a sport .. or get a hobby or something..
Wow Dan ... I never relized until now just how much time I really did spend with you!

quizly

Here is a *personal quiz
If it isnt quite obvious that i am dying of bordom.. ya must be blind :P
Click it and fill it if yas want---> -> The quiz <-

PEI

So... Here I am on PEI..."Oficially". The thing that I have been writing about quite often in this blog.. I have come to the conclusion that the "things" which I have suspected are true.. I love being vague. That does lead me to relize I didn't make a mistake in certain aspects.

I miss Dan already.. and it hasnt even been 24 hours...jeeze.
This is definetly going to be a strange summer, I can feel it.
So I got an actual little journal thing like I have mentioned previously..which means this blog will become much less personal..Which may just may be a good thing considering that it is posted on the internet.. haha.

Other news-> We got to the island around 3:30pm and went around and said our "hellos" to my family, and I then began trying to get ready to go out with Ranna and all them..which sucked.. I hate trying to find clothes to wear.. Life would be so much easier nude. Got into town around 9 or something and snuck Dan to Robs place for a surprise. Which proved to be interesting..

The crowd was and interesting mix, because I havent seen most of the ppl since last August at a beach party..and I seen others whom I used to know as a child..I drank extremely quickly. .. a tender mix of smirnoff ice and breezers.. wonderful.. The smirnoff shouldn't have been involved because..I drank way to quickly..

I was in one of my chatty moods at Robs place..but then we went to JR's .. only to have my lisence taken because it was expired..I gave the friggen bouncer a hug for letting me in :S (That really bugs and grosses me out cause the time before Saterday night that I went out,, some bouncer asked me to "come home" with him..eww) I got into the bar and remember flashes of such things as 1)The bar was crappy, small and dark 2)I dont remember seeing anyone that I knew..at all..It was as if i was there by myself 3) I made it into the bathroom to get sick 4)Next thing I knew Dan was aiding me to the ally way and i found some random chair {Totally a scene in a movie} only to get sick again 5)We then slowly made our way to Matt and Rannas..Which I barely remember at all.. All that I know is that I litterally couldnt stand up..I couldnt see a thing..My vision was that blury.. and to top it all off I began weezing and weezing and could not breath while shivering my but off.. I would have most definetly won myself a seat in the drunk tank if timing was right.

Congradulations Jenn!!Your worse drunk ever!!
Thanks you Dan and everyone else who had to put up with me that night..I can only imagine what a drag I was..Hopefully I didnt do anything mean or extremely stupid..

The next morning Dan filled me in with events that I coudnt remember..Things such as mumbeling about "What to do with the land".. The fact that Rob was there.. How I somehow ended up having Matt and Ranna's compfy couch to myself.. and the best thing.. Me jumping out of bed in the middle of the night over Rob (Who I thought was Matt) and over to a door by the computer mumbling how "I have to get out of here" ..Yeah,. And that was most definetly not the door outside.
Again ..Sorry for anyone who had to put up with me :S

Oh yeah,,Then I experienced my first semi~hangover then next day..

The rest of the weekend wasnt that interesting..I did get to apply for jobs with Chels in the crappy freezing rain on Monday..
Hopefully I get a good job..There has to be something out there ... right? I am getting tired now.. I had a big day of cutting family members hair..woo hoo.. I also need to get back into excercising ..that last week of exams didnt help..

yo

So I am gettin ready for PEI tomorrow.. I will be leaving around 10:30.. im getting really excited..I will get home and then that night be going out with Ranna and whoever else for her b~day..
Eh.. This apartment is a pig's stie.. We just kept putting off doing anything, cause i now dont have any school work .. in other words.. spare time.. We have left everything so long that we are drinking out of jars and eating off of stirophom plates and bowls.. haha
I really dont feel like doing that cleaning thang.. but i gess it muct be done.

So .. Mikes' called me for an interview on PEI.. I dont know anyone who has ever workde there.,, so i dont know if it would be a decent place to work or whatever..

Guess I will have to go to the interview and find out..

yay!! summer is here...ish!!!
Well.Im finished of school.. which is all that really matters.

"doo doo doo
lookin out my back door"<-CCR

Here at the apartment by myself again

woo hoo! Actually .. I havent been stuck at home for a whle now.. I have been hangin out with many random ppl.. Guess that is what happens nearing the end of exam time when everyone is heading home..I have gone to DQ 4 days straight now..And then today almost made it 5.. but decided to quit before i made myself sick of my favorite junk food.. I cannot wait to get swimmin in the summer!

I really do not think that i did that well this set of exams. :( I am thinking that would be because I really didnt want to be going to school this entire half..but i thought I was making the right choice {So I wouldnt miss out on the money that i have put towards a year round course.

hmm..I went to hang out with that Dave guys friends last Saterday night..We played a board game.. PPPEEERRRRFFEEECCTT! .. I never like board games for a long while.. so I guess that i am catching up with that along with card games...Cards make me happy :)Gotta love being a big weirdo.. O well.. keeps things intersting..

This summer ..I would like to go to the beach at least 4 to 5 times a week..I woud like to do some sort of boating adventure..a camping adventure.{along with some hiking of course}..I plan to go on quite a few road trips..One in particular to visit my friend Natasha.and the rest pretty much to see Dan :P..I also plan to get into better shape,, so i can pass the police acadamy physical.
"I wanna know, have seen the rain?
I wanna know, have you ever seen the rain?
Coming down on a sunny day.."
^
I know.. more random CCR :D

I gotta get out of the whole procasination thang! Ok.. off to do something...productive..hopefully :)
PEI This Saterday!!
HAPPY EALYISH B~DAY ALEX!!!!!!!!!:
HAPPY EARLIER BIRTHDAY CORANNA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D:D:D:D

:P

So .. My mood has been nuts lately..I mean one time i am crazy happy and ready to rule the world and then the next.. im extremely negative..A nd feeling helpless
Right now i am feeling pretty good.. I think that a lot of this has to do with my mixed feelings about going back to PEI..
I need to dye my hair and maybe get it styled .. somthing kinda funky
Any ideas?
I gave chicken a hair cut today.. she has been shedding like crazy so I though i would give her a nice cool trim.. Since she is a kitty and doesnt like to stay still too long.. It is a pretty funny looking doo.. Well It isnt too bad..She just looks really scrawny.. Im just glad that i didnt accidently cut her..That would be sad.

Last night I had a movie night..
A guy that I got drunk with and met last friday came over and we went to Blockbuster together.. I think it is pretty cool to be that casual with a friend when it is only your second time meeting them.. We watched "Control" ..which was totally one of my type of movies.. It has a psychology experiment.. giving patients drugs to help reduce their **Killer behavior..
It was a nice mix between the twisted mind of a criminal.. and the use of psyological test.. I reccomed it for the viewing of others..I also went to the cinames to see Sin City the night before..Which was even more to my satisfaction surprisingly..I saw the trailer for it.. and it seemed to be okay.. but the movie was amazingly exciting! I would watch at least 2 more times (andi am one of those ppl who watch a good movie once and are never apealed to watch it again..which is why i never buy DVDs)
Last night was jsut what I needed.. A stress free night of chillin with a friend watchin some flicks.

Im still trying to find the least expensive way to PEI.. Hopefully it will all work out :)
Wow I have a lot of useless garbage in my head..Eh it all has to come out sometime lol

eh

So I made a point not to post till after an interview that I had today.. It was for PC financial {Where DAnial works} .. It would have been good cause' The training wouldn't start till May 18 so i could go to PEI and fix up my family :P and see everyone.. and not have to go through the big moving thing. Well This interview didn't go so well.. I went for a nap and woke up with a half an hour to get ready.. I didnt even shower for it I was that rushed. .That was really really stupid of me to do, because then I was "Wake up stupid" .. I couldn't think at all.. She was asking me all of those damn questions and i went dumb.. WTF? I am not shy.. I was prepared for the interview the night before.. and i began to think about all the little things..
1)I just found out about the interview last night
2)I am smack in the middle of exams..Why couldnt i say that i would do it on monday instead? :S
3)Who is stupid enough to take a nap right before the intervie and not even set the alarm. I even had a dream during that nap of many unfortanate events that lead to me missing the interview
4)I did almost cause an accident while driving on my way there. I blame it on temperary blindness
5)I got extremly rushed and fustrated on my way there due to heavy traffic.. couln't find a parking spot..I was luck to be there right on time.
6)I parked on an area of private parking for a minister..I was in that much of a panic

-------Which led to me rushinng out after the interview to see if my car was towed.. It wasnt.. Instead some very nice old lady parked behind me to block me in..Purposley mind you..I know this because as I began to attempt to manouver my way out of the spot. She came out and began giving me a hard time.. "The minsters are and out of here all the time" I probably deserved this..A sign from god? It is a sign of something for sure! There wasnt a single car in that lot.. Then 20 minutes later packed with only one spot to spare..
I apologized and told her that i was really sorry (Which i was) .. And I think that she could see my upset and fustratedness somehow. And she just all the sudden said okay.. you are from pei (she checked out the plate) Just dont let it happen again.. and she moved the car to let me out.. Me being so overwhelmed with everytihing .. began to cry.. I just love driving while cryin .. right downtown..where everyone stares..
--When i finally arrived home Danny was there all cherry... hoping that his gf gets to stay in Fredericton with him.. and I begin to cry again.. So he comforted me and gave an upset girl just what she neede.. To be treated to a wonderful Dairy Queen Treat..

I was so proud.. I usually am horribally stressed for exams. . and really really freaking out (I get extremly anxious for exam taking.. which 40% of the time leads to little panic attacks where i go blank during the exam) This time I was totally cool.. But this just topped it off . I am not a stress wreck of a ball de confusion.

Ya know what.. ? It isnt even that I really wanted that job in particular.. It is just that.. Every interview I have been having lately has been becoming worse and worse.. Before I knew what I was doing.. I knew what i was doin lol.
It also doesnt help that about two days ago I decided that I am going to improve myself.. From everything to mental thoughts (Become more confident) to physical(Goin to the gym)..The biggest thing that I wanted to do is to make a goal .. and then actually achieve it.. Which of course..led me to doing better in interviews.. Which we all know the ending result today..
eh.. okay.. So i got .. most stuff from the days fustrations off my chest.. So I am going to stop whining.

In other news..Exams are half way finished :) Yay..
Yesterday while studying at Tim hortons down town.. Julienne and I had an interesting conversation with some drunk guy at 6 pm.. He was an emotional wreck..{The reason I can say this is because no one really reads this}
He seemed to be an ok guy.. but everything to how he just plopped down beside us.. without anything to him following us up the street a bit at the end ...just seemed a bit strange.. Which is even stranger.. is that he looked extremely familular to me..
Rather than getting into details.. This was a very sad guy.. i dont mean sad in the pathetic sense..I just mean.. he was so sad that it was pouring out of his eyes.. Sadness .. defeat.. and simply fustration.
All of his thoughts were mixed together .. to the point where he didnt even make a whole lot of sense to himself...
I can honestly say tha ti have been pretty close to that feeling..It really made me think (I know I know ,, more thinking) just about how life really is..
eh.. Im not going to bother getting further into that topic either.. It would come out of me just as mixed as it did from him..and he was under the influence ..

I really am at this point..where I really need to make some changes.. they may be gradual but as long as they are eventually achieved.. I need to make some achievemnts..
I need to grow..s o that I can be happy with myself more consistently..
Right now.. I almost feel as if I am floating.. just floating.. In no particular direction.. What a waste it feels!
I hate always feeling as if i am torn in two opposite directions.

---Crap.. I said that I was going to stop whining!!
Jeeze.. lol.. I applied for advantage.. So if i get a reply for that .. we shall see..
The weather is nice.. I think that I need to go for a nice walk.. freshen my head..see where that leads me ..Maybe more icecream :)

:)

This post is mainly to deliver some traffic to Dan's new web page.. It is soo much cooler than mine.. But i did help him out with it.. So it's all good! :)
Scroll down on the right column under links and click on "Danny~G" ..It is a workin ptogress but he is doing so well :P
Check it out

what a night

okay..What a night
I can honeslty say that I soo much fun last night.. I mean wow
I drank the most I have since the summer that Dan and I began going out.. (Well minus all the dequila at the old apartment..which was just like water)
wow.. It was amazing :)
lol.. But since i turned 19 i get Id'd EVERYTIME now
Since it was the last day of classes.. The bar was PACKED!
I danced like mad.. lol. . I was a crazy drunk dancer.. I met another hippy..
I had my own version of crown serfing lol!
I also was flashed by a girl.. weeiirrd.. She was showing off her nipple piercing
lol
And not to mention.. There was some guy and..I just knew for some reason he was a big asshole.. So i bitch slapped him lol..
Soo much happened..
I also made a 1am call to one of my good male friends(Will not disclose the name)
And got all emotional because he is such a good friend..

Good times :)

I am getting excited about gettin back to PEI.. I wonder what place has replaced Myrons now.. hmm

hehehe

Our chicken cat is soo cute :)..
Dan bought a Micki of Jack Daniel's and had it last night. And she runs around the entire apartment playing with it.. Who would think that a cat would be such a fond drinker of J.D ;)

It is so cute though...Seeing her *chase that bottle
..lol. This almost sounds like animal cruelty..
I really need a digital camera so i can post pictures of her doing things like that

another

so .. It is officially official.. I am going to PEI for the summer... The summer so far.. Who knows where i will end up next fall.. I am excited about it but yet obviously a lil sad.. cause that means that Danial will be here in fredericton.. But as I said..Lots of visits

So yes.. Fun at the beach.. I have never gone a summer without that yet! I think that I will live with my family.. but i dunno .. That may depend on other things .. Like I will be looking for a job in town.. So I wont be bringing the car.. Which may be an inconvenience.
I shall see.

This Friday should be fun.. .. but I now really really need to get into studying.. I mean i havent gone to class yet this week, which is a bad sign!

One summer When I was in junior high i kept a journal.. And i wrote in it Every single day.. I think that I will try to d otha tagain this summer.. Maybe not every day.. but at least once a week.. That would be good..
Ouch my lip is stinging

crap

man.. this blog is messed.. The post that is after the pic of Jill and I didn't work before and then magically apeared today.. same as the one I did today.. which is why I might be talking about the same things more than once,, Im also sure that the exact same thing will happen with this one!

19

So I am now 19.. wow.. No more sneaking into bars..no more underage anything.. I have recieved so far a couple of cute e~cards from Ranna' and Moe.. aww ..
Last night Dan made me a yum yum bithday supper :D .. mm so good. And he gave me a birthday -> Sewing kit (yay now i can make clothes ish), two different kinds of bubble bath (One for stress and relief theraputic and the other basically a natural mix of things in the form of white chocalates) and finally a cute set of chimes for decoration.. (I love decoration)
So that made me happy.. Then we settled down for our first night of our cable.. lol
-Oh yeah he also got me some special sandman tea that is meant to help me sleep :)
Which i did actually have much trouble sleeping last night, for a number of reasons that had nothing to do with my birthday.. I didnt fall asleep till 6:30 am with the time change.. Im extremely stressed out about what is going to happen after I am finished of exams..not to mention exams themselves .. I have been contemplating between living on pei and fredericton.. Dan will be staying in F---- this summer for sure..
The main reason I am seriously considering moving to PEI is because my family seems to be in real need of help.. Everything from financial things to personal things.I dont think that I will get into it too much here because I have no idea who reads this..and it is very personal for me.
Our family has never been well off... we have had some really hard winters..and I guess that this last one for them has been one of the worst. Im am kinda confused about things.. But last night/this morning.. I have seemed to come to the conclusion that it may be best for me to move to PEI for the summer.. I know that my family misses me just as much as I do them..So I would like to go back to help them ,, in every way that i can.. Dan agrees that this would be good considering the situation.. (i am leaving a lot of details out).. The thing is that if I go then no one will take care of Dan .. lol He will get lonely.. but I guess it is for the best... This is what I have been thinking.. But as everone knows.. I will have to give it a little more time because I tend to find new perspectives. And there is the issue that I cannot stand living with my entire family for more than a week at a time without going nutty..But I would have to find ways around that.. I cant always worry about myself for things.. And also from what i hear I may not have to worry about dealing with them all in one house.. for reasons.. Fuck fuck fuck.. I am having trouble expressing myself.. I shouldnt censor this because of people I dont know reading it, I shouldnt give a shit about that!
:( Another time

Heya Ben! This is Jill.. And she is pretty friggen happy here!

So ya.. up there is an old friend of mine Jill and I on graduation.. and she reminds me ever so much of Ben's chik Emily.. There attitudes, and mannerisms rather than their physical appearance. I have not spoken to Jill since the summer.. I think that I will give her a call... And the pic below is yet another of Chels and I when I was back in PEI for x~mas..
Wow It is april and my classes are finished by the end of this week! Today is my rent's anniversary and tonight is my B~day.. Both numero 19!
Yes thats right, my parents got married and then i was born the next morning ..
I am now old.. lol. No I wont be old for a while.. But now I wont have the excitement of sneaking into bars.. I went to kareokeelast Wed. It was pertty fun.Yet different then what I expected..Which is all that I will say!

I also saw the movie "Hitch" last night.. It was a good movie.. It was one of those that you see and you leave the theatre with a lil bit of hope for life.. Made me feel, that it can end up well in the end..
I want to go swimming
and for a jog..
and take over the world mu hahhahaha.. YEAH right! Like I want to take over that much chaos.
I am so easily distracted,,Lately every time i go to post... Someone starts chatting to me on MSN.. and that is the end of it.. as it is now!

ehhh graw!